I’m at work right now in the office if a dance studio, watching the advanced girls through the window. They’re just starting with pliés and stretches but it is beautiful. There is something about these teenage girls being so devoted to this art form that demands so much of them and that hardly any of their peers understand and that teaches them to challenge themselves and work hard and create beauty and learn to embody beauty in an artistic instead of an objectified way that makes me all sisterhood-weepy.
If there’s anything in my life that I would approximate to a ritual like prayer or meditation it’s probably pliés.
Step 329: If someone is waiting on something they *really* want that is out of their control, don’t constantly ask them if it’s happened yet
Is your friend …
• Unemployed and searching for a job?
• Wanting to find the right someone but hasn’t?
• Trying to get pregnant and having a hard time with it?
• Waiting to hear back from that dream grad school program?
When the thing they have desperately been waiting for happens, they will tell you. Peppering them with questions and/or unsolicited advice on how they can better achieve this life goal is probably not what they’re looking for.
Instead, it’s just depressing to have to vocalize, again and again, that no, the thing they want has not yet happened, and then have to sit patiently while the other person tells them to keep their chin up, or that the right one is coming, or whatever.
It’s great to ask, more generally, how everything is with them. If they want to cry on your shoulder or share great news, they will.
She died unmarried with 10,000 horses."
Why yes, it IS a perfect Monday to sit around and make pumpkin chocolate chip pancakes at 11:30 in the morning and read the NYT’s fabulous long-form article about a guy who went to this tiny village in Greece to find the source of this one particular kind of folk music and take a nap for two hours and hang out with my goddamn ridiculously delightful boyfriend and then go have an excellent rehearsal with the company and have peanut sauce noodles and cheesecake and then show Beasts of the Southern Wild to delightful boyfriend.
I guess this is what weekends are like for people who don’t work on the weekends? I need a proper job so I can have weekends too.
None of these things are necessary for survival and reproduction. That is exactly what makes them so splendid. When we take our basic evolutionary wiring and transform it into something far beyond any prosaic matters of survival and reproduction … that’s when humanity is at its best. That’s when we show ourselves to be capable of creating meaning and joy, for ourselves and for one another. That’s when we’re most uniquely human.
And the same is true for sex. Human beings have a deep, hard-wired urge to replicate our DNA, instilled in us by millions of years of evolution. And we’ve turned it into an intense and delightful form of communication, intimacy, creativity, community, personal expression, transcendence, joy, pleasure, and love. Regardless of whether any DNA gets replicated in the process.
Why should we see this as sinful? What makes this any different from chocolate souffles and King Lear?"
things that are cute
- and you
- all of you